I'd never leave you behind
by bethvicious
Summary: Stiles is thinking about his life. Dread Doctors were gone, Mason was saved, Lydia has learnt how to use her powers. He has made up with Scott and his dad was fine. However, he is starting to realize that he maybe forgot someone in all this mess. And this person is actually knocking at his room door. One-shot. Post 5x20.
Disclaimer : I do not own Teen Wolf !

 **A/N** : Hi everyone ! So here is a OS about Stiles and Malia. I really love them, their chimestry, and was really frustrated about their "break-up" so... I tried to write it. I know it is sad and all but you know I wanted to write a proper break-up for them, and I thought about 4x07 and the "I'd never leave you behind" scene... I think you'll recognize it anyway. It's translated from the fic I originally wrote in french, so sorry if some things are not quite understandable (and thanks to yeahstalias on tumblr for helping me with my english mistakes !)... I think some stydia shippers could like this OS as well as stalia shippers could hate it but please guys no hate on this, it is just a short story about fictional characters, if you don't like, just ignore it. Anyway, I hope you'll enjoy it, don't be afraid to review :)

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 _I'd never leave you behind_

They finally made it through. Not all of them were unharmed – physically as well as psychologically speaking – but they were alive. Mason was saved, the Dread Doctors were gone, Theo disappeared under the ground with his dead sister and Hayden was now part of the pack. Still everything was far from perfect. Indeed the pack just came through its darkest hours and some wounds simply needed time to heal. Actually there were so many things that have changed in the past few weeks and he could not keep that plan he's had in his mind. The "vision", as he liked to call it.

Stiles was standing in front of his board, erasing little by little the information and clues he had written. He was removing the evidence, the portraits as well as the tape which was keeping them up. It was kind of a habit he got right after the nogitsune was gone. Each time they made it through, he cleared his head. Like if he was trying to sum everything up. Kira had gone with Skywalkers. No one knows if she will ever come back. Lydia learnt how to control her powers and brought Mason back.

Lydia.

Their friendship has changed a lot since the past few weeks. He was thinking more and more about it and realized that they had never been so close. Of course, rescuing her from Eichen House and her being hospitalized several times made them closer. But it was more than that and Stiles could not still figure out what he felt for her. Moreover he had to learn to rebuild his friendship with Scott besides all the other things he was caring about: Lydia, Liam, his Dad… And maybe he forgot something with all this mess. Someone.

Malia.

They never talked about the conversation they had in her car. They never actually talked again since it happened. He was not able to tell if they were still together or if he still had feelings for her. Of course, she was still important to him. But he was lost. It is true he was worried about her when he heard the Desert Wolf shooting her at Scott. He had gone to get her. He wanted to help her and that's why he – the not supernatural guy – pounced on a sociopath were-coyote. He was lucky he came through this "just" with a gigantic shard of glass in his chest.

He placed his hand on his wound, thinking. Then someone knocked at the door of his room, uncertainly, bringing Stiles back to reality. He turned over and rapidly caught the short-dark-haired girl's eye. He was surprised. She was silently staying at the door, like if there were a barrier of mountain ash preventing her from entering the room. Stiles thought that she would have come in like if she was at hers, few weeks ago. She would have wrapped herself in the covers of his bed, casually. He suddenly realized how much things became complicated between them.

"Hey." she began. "I came to see how you were doing. I wanted to thank you for saving me too."

She still is so direct… The young man thought.

"Um… Well I'm fine. My wound is healing." he stopped. "And, no problem. You would have done the same thing for me, I guess…"

"Of course, I would." she answered like if it was obvious.

There was a silence. Stiles was bothered and didn't know how to behave with her. It had been a long time since the last time they had been alone in the same place.

"What are you doing?" she asked while finally entering the room.

"Oh, I… I'm just clearing my head." he said, looking at his board.

"Good. I came to get back some stuff I left here." she added.

Stiles didn't know if it bothered him or if it was a relief. So, she thought it was over?

"Oh, um… Yeah, okay."

She didn't wait for him to say anything anyway: she was already searching in Stiles' wardrobe. He looked at her; he was worried. He couldn't let her go. Not like this. Not without an explanation. He didn't feel this unease before, because of everything that was happening around them. But now, he was realizing that something was definitely going wrong and he felt like he had to find a solution.

"You know, I wanted to talk about this–" he started.

"About what?" she cut him. She was still searching in his wardrobe. She was acting like they were making small talk.

"Our talk in this car. We never got the chance to talk about it…"

"I don't want to talk about this, Stiles." She stated.

He looked at her a few seconds, speechless. Maybe she wasn't really understanding what was going on between them. Break-ups and ambiguity were pretty new things to her, and she certainly had to deal with this on her own since he wasn't there to help her. He suddenly felt a little bit guilty.

"But I want to." He said with conviction.

"There is nothing to say, Stiles: we broke up. It is as simple as that. Even the were-coyote inside me understands it."

She was still searching in his wardrobe, finding sometimes a shirt, a jean or a bra… Stiles was slowly realizing how much stuff in his room were belonging to Malia.

"Well, maybe we weren't this clear…"he mumbled.

"I said it was okay." She cut him.

He realized that she only looked at him in the eye once since she entered the room. Was she doing this on purpose?

"Hey listen I think this is a talk we should have had way earlier and–"

"Stiles, I–"

"Could you just let me talk please? And when you're having a serious talk with someone you usually look at him in the eye. That's what humans do." he said with irritation before pulling her arm toward him so she could look at him. "I would like…"

But he caught her eye and never finished his sentence. When was the last time he clapped his eyes on her with attention? He examined her face just for a bit. She was looking paler as usually but above all she was looking exhausted. Of course, they all were but Malia used to sleep a lot. The dark circles under her eyes were unusual. Her expression had changed too. She was looking completely lost. The confident Stiles used to see in it has gone and he felt her fragility.

"What?" she was on the defensive. The wild part of her was coming to the surface. It was like if she knew Stiles just scanned her in seconds. Little by little she was withdrawing into herself? It was the first time he saw her acting like this. So he asked:

"What's wrong with you?"

"I'm fine." she lied.

Even if he wasn't a were wolf and had no super hearing, Stiles hadn't to listen to her heart beats to know she was lying. And he didn't know what bothered him the most: her lying to him or the fact she wasn't fine. Also he couldn't help but feel some tenderness towards her. And as a consequence, he whispered while putting his hand on her cheek:

"Mal… You know that–"

"Don't." she said before stopping Stiles' hand whereas he barely touched her skin. "Please, don't do this."

She looked at him in the eyes, and it disconcerted him. He found pain in her expression, and that made his heart hurt more than he wanted to.

"Do what?"

"You know what."

They were staring at each other defiantly. Like two strangers. However Malia's stuff that could be seen everywhere in Stiles' room was showing the exact opposite.

"I don't get it. Are we still together or not? Because it was clear to me when you shut the car door, it was over." she said with no expression.

Stiles felt like he was in front of the were coyote instead of her. She still had trouble with hidden meanings and unsaid things.

"Well, I don't know… I never said anything that suggests this, to be honest…" he hesitated, playing with his hands.

"That's the problem, Stiles. You broke up with me and ignored me for weeks whereas I was willing to support you. I was really worried about you – you know that's pretty new to me – and I tried to protect you the best that I could and I failed." she admitted, with a weak voice. It was like she was working on this for a long time.

He couldn't really figure out what was going on in her mind. She was about to say something else. She hesitated:

"I tried to move on something else and to get used to the idea that I have to…" She stopped with a hurt breath. "That I have to make it through without you, now." she finished.

She looked at him with teary eyes. Malia usually never cried. Of course, Stiles had already seen her with tears in her eyes before, but she never actually cried in front of a member of the pack. Even in front of him. He was ill-at-ease with her being so fragile in front of him. He felt guilty to have ignored her. He didn't know what to do. He wanted to hug her, to apologize – to kiss her maybe – but he was also afraid to make things even more complicated than they already were.

Many seconds passed. Stiles had his mouth half-open and was totally helpless in front of his girlfriend, ex-girlfriend, friend's – he didn't know anymore – pain. He was trying hard to find a solution in her expression. But he never found it. So he came closer quietly and he softly placed his hand on her neck. Malia tried to push him back:

"Stiles, don't…" her voice was shaking. The balance she was trying to maintain was about to rollover.

"Shhh…" he whispered.

And then he caught her lips soflty. She wanted to protest but no sound ever came out of her mouth. Stiles placed his free hand on her cheek, kissing her even slower. That wasn't a heated kiss but something way chaster, more reserved. It was a mix of melancholia, sadness and unavowed things. Their breaths were like one and the young man realized how much he missed the feeling of the were-coyote's lips against his. But, even though he desired her, Stiles knew deep down inside him it wouldn't ever be the same between them. Because he was still feeling this unease in his stomach. And somewhere in his head, Lydia was still there too.

That's why he broke the kiss, gently laying his forehead against Malia's. He was keeping his eyes firmly closed. They kept silent for some seconds, until the short-hair girl got rid of his embrace slowly. She looked at him, her eyes still teary.

"It's her, isn't it? It's Lydia?"

Stiles couldn't help but look the other way, he was feeling ill-at-ease, guilty. And when he finally dared catching her eye again, he saw two tears rolling on her cheeks. He wanted to take her in his arms, but she prevented him from doing it.

"Don't. I kind of knew it. It's okay." she said while quickly wiping her tears. She sighed.

"Mal… I'm sorry…" Stiles apologized.

"At least I will add "to fell heart-broken" on the list "things I feel for the first time." she added, trying to smile.

Stiles ran his hand across his hair. He didn't know what else to say or to do. Seeing Malia hurt because of him was driving him crazy. But so was life: feelings were uncontrollable unfortunately. Malia was getting through this stuff like each human on this earth. But when he thought about this, he suddenly realized how much she had changed since she got back to her human form. He saw her getting used to all the human things. And despite the actual situation, he was so proud of her.

"You have made so much progress, you know." he muttered with a soft voice. He had a little smile, on his lips, trying to comfort her.

"Yeah, I guess." she sniffed. She tried to smile back.

Afterwards, she finished to pack up her stuff, silently. Stiles was patiently waiting, sitting on his bed. He was thinking about what just happened between us. He felt eased on one hand and guilty on the other hand. But, it was the best thing to do. Sometimes, one had to decide for its heart. Maybe in some years, he would realize that he was actually in love with Malia instead of Lydia. But if really cared about her, he would be able to get away from her not to hurt her again. Even if he had to suffer.

"Well, I'm going to go."

The girl's voice brought him back to reality. He then stood up and saw her to his room's door. He didn't know how to act with her now. Should he hug her or something?

"So… is it over, now?" she asked, with a low voice. She was looking at him in the eyes.

"Yeah…" he finished, on the same tone.

He had no idea what else to do. Malia smiled a little to him. She didn't know what to do either. Stiles had a strange feeling, as if he was about to forget something. He couldn't let her leave this way. The guilt of hurting her like this was unbearable. That's why he softly curled her fingers with hers, one last time.

"But, hey, don't forget… I'd never leave you behind." he whispered before giving her one last kiss on her forehead affectionately.

There.

Now, it was over.


End file.
